sometimes quiet is violent

So, long time no see. I had an intense summer serving breakfast lunch and dinner to Italian summer school kids, and showing people to their seats at Edinburgh Castle. I worked so much this summer that after my last shift in August I spent a week and a half going out and doing things every day in a row to make up for the not-summer that I had, which, if you know me, is not my style. I'm very much a "give me a few days to recuperate after an outing" kind of person. But, today's post is actually not about my work experiences, but about more positive things! The last post I wrote on this blog was quite sad, and I'm happy to say I've gotten a lot better from then on. I've noticed some things in myself that have led me to be quite happy right now, and I want to share, lest this blog always be about me being pissed off or sad or anxious. Lately, I've found myself engaging (mainly online, but also in person) with people in a way that I couldn't have be...

Hi guys! So as some of you might have noticed, I have recently begun making new videos for my youtube channel. Those that have been around since 2011 know that I have been making them for several years, but most of those videos are hidden now. Really, I have several reasons why I have started creating things in video form again, and I'm discovering new problems that didn't really affect me back in 2011 and 2012. Some of the main differences between 15-year old me and 20-year old me are very easy to point out. 15-year old me cared less what people thought, was less of a perfectionist, and wasn't comparing herself to other video makers. 20-year old me is highly self aware of absolutely EVERYTHING concerning her video making process. I saved up and upgraded from a little 70€ Canon digital camera to the Canon 700D (my first DSLR I'm so proud), but the camera only changes the quality, not the content. I, as I'm aware most creative types, suffer from all kinds of anxi...

Hi everyone! During the last few weeks between my latest blog post and this one, a whole number of things have changed in my life. I've moved to another country (!), moved into student accommodation, bought myself a whole lot of dishes and cooking supplies, learned what a pain it is when your fridge doesn't work and your milk goes bad, and probably most importantly of all I've met a lot of new people. In my last post I wrote about the awful limbo I felt I was stuck in. Right now, writing this in my bed (though feeling a bit ill), I feel like the limbo was worth it. Having nothing to do for a month was just preparing me for having EVERYTHING to do in one week. There are so many people to meet, so many TV-shows and movies to talk about, so many people from other countries teaching me the naughty words in their native language. I'm so thankful to everyone who has come up and talked to me, or even just answered when I've said something to them. The good thing about ...