"I'm not a feminist"
I'm angry a lot. Not at everything (yet). But a lot of things. One of these things is girls who say shit like "I'm not a feminist." [If the word feminist makes you cringe and shiver I advise you to leave now]
Really now? Equal rights, not your thing?
I'm fine with you ceasing to vote really. Cover up your ankles though, and don't go to school, its for boys.
Before talking about why girls might say they aren't feminists, I'm gonna start with explaining why I'm a feminist. I'm a feminist, because I'm sick of hearing stories of girls being sexualized at school. Teachers concentrating more on what girls are wearing than on teaching boys not to assault them. Boohoo, little Timmy can't concentrate in class because Anna is wearing shorts. Maybe Timmy should get a grip on his life. I'm a feminist because I believe that the victim of rape is never the guilty party. Because I'm tired of hearing "she should have worn a longer skirt". I'm a feminist because I'm sick of body shaming and slut-shaming and internalized misogyny. I'm sick of girls being set against each other and men getting to decide what we do with our bodies.
Now, if you're still here after that introductory paragraph, you're probably gonna make it through. So, girls who say they aren't feminists usually do so for many reasons. Maybe they don't like the word "feminist" because its too "gendered" and brings to mind bra-burning man haters. But you know what? That is specifically why we need more girls to use the name, to identify as feminists. Because only by taking the title, and explaining it to everyone you meet that no, you're not "one of those feminists" but explaining why you call yourself one is our way of taking back the word, making it mean positive things again. And its called "feminism" because we are the oppressed. Yes, equality is our goal but to get there we need to bring women to the same level as men. It makes sense to name it after the oppressed gender, no?
Emma Watson recently spoke at the UN about feminism. Things she said were obvious yes, but not for everyone. Despite her speech being nothing absolutely revolutionary, she did get a massive amount of positive support all over social networks, and I think that's important. She has been a role model to little girls everywhere ever since she took that role as Hermione in Harry Potter. Now, she is telling those same girls about feminism, and is using the word, not trying to explain it away. I think that's really great.
Some girls who say they aren't feminists back up this stance by stating that they "don't mind being in the kitchen" and accept "traditional values" and gender stereotypes. Listen, I don't give a shit about wether or not you like making sandwiches or not. Hell, I like making food and cooking and baking and being in the kitchen. Doesn't mean I don't want to get a job and be paid the same damn amount of money. Just because I like serving people from time to time doesn't mean I don't want to vote.
You might also want to consider this: you're most likely living in a country that is fairly equal. You don't think sexism really exists anymore. You're comfortable, don't want to make a fuss. But there are women all around the world; Pakistan, India, Jemen, everywhere, that aren't treated like human beings because of their gender. The thing about privilege is that it can only be used for good if you acknowledge you have it and try to do something to help others. Its easy for women living in America or Europe to say they aren't feminists, they aren't subjected to the very real reality of sexism on a larger level.
Yes, I know, there are a lot of aggressive feminists. Who knows, after this blog post many of you might think I'm one of them. But believe me, after a while of dealing with misogyny, bigoted people, never ending stories of ridiculous school dress codes and victim blaming, you start to get really angry.
Then a man says something feminists have been raving on about forever. Like, "why don't you just stop raping people. It's not the woman's fault she was assaulted" and suddenly they deserve a medal. We're so used to people being against us that when someone actually confirms what we are saying they expect us to be so thankful that they're being a decent person. Yeah, its great you're saying stuff that supports us. There is no "congrats on not being sexist" cookie. It's called basic human decency.
I'm just really tired. Of trying to show off feminism to people like its a product I'm trying to sell. Trying to explain to men that yes, feminism will benefit them too with the breaking of patriarchal expectations.
I read an article today where two very different men explained their stance on feminism. I didn't like how the article was done, there was a lot of irrelevant stuff in it, but mainly it surprised me how there could still be people like that in the world. One of the men explained how he thinks power should be given back to men. Excuse me? We can't give back something we don't have. Just because the media is (and should) bringing up feminist causes once in a while doesn't mean we have the power. CEO might as well stand for straight white male, because that is what most of the world's CEO's are. We don't have the power, and we don't want all of it. We want our share. My brother told me feminism is like communism, because we "want everything to be shared". What a thought, eh?
I've come across a similar mindset about homosexuality too. That just because the media is being decent and supporting equality it's somehow "encouraging" homosexuality, and that the world today is so accepting. Newsflash, just because a magazine includes a positive message on being queer doesn't mean the world is the same. There isn't some Cosmopolitan safe house you can go to after being beaten by your unaccepting father. If you come out, you're often on your own and whether or not the Times or some other magazine has advocated gay rights doesn't matter. Its the real world and the media can't help you live your entire life under oppression.
So yeah, I don't know if it was clear but I totally think anyone can be a feminist. Men, yes. Please do. Please spread the message among your friends, tweet about it, get people involved. Just don't expect a reward for being a decent person. I was very happy that an incredible amount of male celebrities (especially) took a stand and supported Emma Watson. I think its important, that young boys see their heroes, the men they look up to from TV and movies stand for equality. It gives me hope that maybe in 20 years there won't be as many sexists in the world. Maybe feminist won't be a curse word, but something people are proud to be. I can only hope.
Most of you probably don't really give a shit about this. You've got other causes you support, animal rights or the rights of immigrants. I get it, those are important causes as well. But I feel like if you care about a fox in a cage halfway across the world more than you care about women being raped and oppressed halfway across the world there's something wrong with your priorities. Don't get me wrong, you're allowed to support many causes, there are no rules against that. It would just be really great if people put as much energy into saving women from Pakistan as they did into saving a fox from being turned into fur.
P.S. Trans-exclusive feminism isn't feminism.
-Becks
Really now? Equal rights, not your thing?
I'm fine with you ceasing to vote really. Cover up your ankles though, and don't go to school, its for boys.
Before talking about why girls might say they aren't feminists, I'm gonna start with explaining why I'm a feminist. I'm a feminist, because I'm sick of hearing stories of girls being sexualized at school. Teachers concentrating more on what girls are wearing than on teaching boys not to assault them. Boohoo, little Timmy can't concentrate in class because Anna is wearing shorts. Maybe Timmy should get a grip on his life. I'm a feminist because I believe that the victim of rape is never the guilty party. Because I'm tired of hearing "she should have worn a longer skirt". I'm a feminist because I'm sick of body shaming and slut-shaming and internalized misogyny. I'm sick of girls being set against each other and men getting to decide what we do with our bodies.
Now, if you're still here after that introductory paragraph, you're probably gonna make it through. So, girls who say they aren't feminists usually do so for many reasons. Maybe they don't like the word "feminist" because its too "gendered" and brings to mind bra-burning man haters. But you know what? That is specifically why we need more girls to use the name, to identify as feminists. Because only by taking the title, and explaining it to everyone you meet that no, you're not "one of those feminists" but explaining why you call yourself one is our way of taking back the word, making it mean positive things again. And its called "feminism" because we are the oppressed. Yes, equality is our goal but to get there we need to bring women to the same level as men. It makes sense to name it after the oppressed gender, no?
Emma Watson recently spoke at the UN about feminism. Things she said were obvious yes, but not for everyone. Despite her speech being nothing absolutely revolutionary, she did get a massive amount of positive support all over social networks, and I think that's important. She has been a role model to little girls everywhere ever since she took that role as Hermione in Harry Potter. Now, she is telling those same girls about feminism, and is using the word, not trying to explain it away. I think that's really great.
Some girls who say they aren't feminists back up this stance by stating that they "don't mind being in the kitchen" and accept "traditional values" and gender stereotypes. Listen, I don't give a shit about wether or not you like making sandwiches or not. Hell, I like making food and cooking and baking and being in the kitchen. Doesn't mean I don't want to get a job and be paid the same damn amount of money. Just because I like serving people from time to time doesn't mean I don't want to vote.
You might also want to consider this: you're most likely living in a country that is fairly equal. You don't think sexism really exists anymore. You're comfortable, don't want to make a fuss. But there are women all around the world; Pakistan, India, Jemen, everywhere, that aren't treated like human beings because of their gender. The thing about privilege is that it can only be used for good if you acknowledge you have it and try to do something to help others. Its easy for women living in America or Europe to say they aren't feminists, they aren't subjected to the very real reality of sexism on a larger level.
Yes, I know, there are a lot of aggressive feminists. Who knows, after this blog post many of you might think I'm one of them. But believe me, after a while of dealing with misogyny, bigoted people, never ending stories of ridiculous school dress codes and victim blaming, you start to get really angry.
Then a man says something feminists have been raving on about forever. Like, "why don't you just stop raping people. It's not the woman's fault she was assaulted" and suddenly they deserve a medal. We're so used to people being against us that when someone actually confirms what we are saying they expect us to be so thankful that they're being a decent person. Yeah, its great you're saying stuff that supports us. There is no "congrats on not being sexist" cookie. It's called basic human decency.
I'm just really tired. Of trying to show off feminism to people like its a product I'm trying to sell. Trying to explain to men that yes, feminism will benefit them too with the breaking of patriarchal expectations.
I read an article today where two very different men explained their stance on feminism. I didn't like how the article was done, there was a lot of irrelevant stuff in it, but mainly it surprised me how there could still be people like that in the world. One of the men explained how he thinks power should be given back to men. Excuse me? We can't give back something we don't have. Just because the media is (and should) bringing up feminist causes once in a while doesn't mean we have the power. CEO might as well stand for straight white male, because that is what most of the world's CEO's are. We don't have the power, and we don't want all of it. We want our share. My brother told me feminism is like communism, because we "want everything to be shared". What a thought, eh?
I've come across a similar mindset about homosexuality too. That just because the media is being decent and supporting equality it's somehow "encouraging" homosexuality, and that the world today is so accepting. Newsflash, just because a magazine includes a positive message on being queer doesn't mean the world is the same. There isn't some Cosmopolitan safe house you can go to after being beaten by your unaccepting father. If you come out, you're often on your own and whether or not the Times or some other magazine has advocated gay rights doesn't matter. Its the real world and the media can't help you live your entire life under oppression.
So yeah, I don't know if it was clear but I totally think anyone can be a feminist. Men, yes. Please do. Please spread the message among your friends, tweet about it, get people involved. Just don't expect a reward for being a decent person. I was very happy that an incredible amount of male celebrities (especially) took a stand and supported Emma Watson. I think its important, that young boys see their heroes, the men they look up to from TV and movies stand for equality. It gives me hope that maybe in 20 years there won't be as many sexists in the world. Maybe feminist won't be a curse word, but something people are proud to be. I can only hope.
Most of you probably don't really give a shit about this. You've got other causes you support, animal rights or the rights of immigrants. I get it, those are important causes as well. But I feel like if you care about a fox in a cage halfway across the world more than you care about women being raped and oppressed halfway across the world there's something wrong with your priorities. Don't get me wrong, you're allowed to support many causes, there are no rules against that. It would just be really great if people put as much energy into saving women from Pakistan as they did into saving a fox from being turned into fur.
P.S. Trans-exclusive feminism isn't feminism.
-Becks
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